How to gracefully and painlessly remove yourself from sticky social situations？How to escape a dull conversation at a party?
Escape a dull coversation 结束无聊的谈话
At a cocktail party (assuming you haven’t made the mistake of sitting down with the person), it’s fine to excuse yourself to get a drink or food, help the hostess, or make a phone call. (If you did sit down, employ the same tactics. It’s just a little more awkward having to get up.) To avoid an embarrassing getaway “gotcha,” be sure to follow through on your excuse — that is, get the drink, help the hostess, make a call.
nother tried-and-true tactic? Introduce the bore to someone else, excuse yourself, and scram. This way, you avoid leaving the bore stranded, and he becomes someone else’s problem. Who knows? They may hit it off.
Escape a telemarketer 逃离电话营销员
A polite “Thanks, I’m not interested” is your best response to unwanted calls. “The caller will probably come back with a benefit statement or a probing question” — such as Are you aware this will cut your insurance bill in half? — says Kimberly King, president of InterWeave Corporation, a customer-service consulting firm in Tampa. Again, thank the person and hang up. Don’t let her rattle on, which is a waste of your time and hers. And never explain or volunteer anything. Telemarketers work from a script with responses to common customer objections (called “soft no’s” in the industry). Saying another family member needs to make the decision will only lead to more questions: What time will he be in? Can I call back then? Finally, ask to be taken off the calling list, and wait for the telemarketer to do it before you hang up. That extra minute is worth it.
一句客气的“谢谢，我不感兴趣”是给烦人电话的最好答复。打电话的人大概又会说他/她将给你带来什么样的好处，或者问你这样的问题，比如Kimberly King会问：“你知道吗，这能让你的保险帐单费减半。” Kimberly KingInter是Weave Corporation的总裁，这是一家位于坦帕市的客服咨询公司。你继续说谢谢，然后就挂断电话。别由她叽里呱啦说个不停，浪费你俩的时间。不要做任何解释或自愿做任何事情。电话营销员都采用一个脚本来对付客户通常做出的拒绝（行话叫“软拒绝”）。如果你回答道：这要由家人做决定。那他/她就会穷追不舍，提出更多问题：他什么时候会在家里? 到时候我再打电话好吗？最后，只好要求他/她把你的号码从呼叫单上撤除，并且要求对方撤除后你再挂电话。多花点时间是值得的。
Escape a Stumper 如何对付“提难题的人”
How do you say “I don’t know” without sounding, well, dumb? Especially in a nerve-racking setting, like a job interview? Be direct, says Sue Shellenbarger, a career-advice columnist at the Wall Street Journal: Just say, “That’s a GREat question. I’d like to think about it and get back to you.”
If you don’t have a good answer because you haven’t been doing your job well, apologize and specify when you’ll get back on the query; then be sure to do so or you’ll lose credibility. If putting off the question isn’t an option (you’re a keynote speaker at an event; you’re being interviewed on TV), employ the Ted Kennedy strategy, says Anne Fisher, who writes Ask Annie, a career-advice column for CNNMoney. com: “Say, ‘That’s a good question, but an even more interesting question is.…’” Then talk about what you do know. “It’s worked for Kennedy,” says Fisher. “He’s been elected eight times.”
如果是因为自己的工作一直没做好而找不到一个好的答案，那么就道歉，然后确定何时反馈该问题的结果；然后，一定要说话算话，否则你将会失去信用了。如果不可能推迟回答问题（例如你在演讲或在电视上被采访），Anne Fisher说可以采取Ted Kennedy（肯尼迪总统的弟弟）的策略。Anne Fisher是CNNMoney网站职业建议专栏《问安妮》专栏作家。你可以说“这个问题问得很好，但更有趣的是......” 然后就说你知道的。” Fisher说：“这个办法帮过Kennedy的忙。他赢得八次议员选举。”
Escape a spat with your significant other 如何结束争执
He started it. Well, maybe you did. Either way, you don’t want to talk about it anymore. Do you have to finish what you began? No, says David Ransburg, a therapist at the Family Institute at Northwestern University, in Evanston, Illinois. In fact, you shouldn’t continue until you’re calm. “When we’re in a ‘flooded’ emotional state, access to the part of the brain where logical thinking resides is inhibited, and IQ drops noticeably — perhaps by as much as 15 points,” says Ransburg. “This is when we say things we wish we could take back.” So call a time-out. Typically, your logic will return in about 20 minutes, at which point you can resume the discussion in a productive way.
刚才是他引发的争吵，嗯，说不定是你。但不管是谁，反正你不想再吵下去了。一定要吵出个究竟才会罢休吗？David Ransburg说：不。David Ransburg是伊利诺斯州Evanston市西北大学家庭学院的一名治疗学家。他说，实际上，在你心情平静前，不应该继续说下去。 Ransburg说：“争吵时，我们都处于一个“头脑发胀“的状态，不理智，智商显著下降了大概15个点，这时候说过的话会让我们后悔”。所以，先暂停。通常，你的逻辑能力会在大约20分钟后恢复，然后以具有成果性的方式进行讨论。
If you can’t call a time-out midspat, practice with tiny disaGREements, suggests Ransburg, when you’re both less likely to take things personally。